5.16.2007

School Fundraiser...The Damage

I realized I promised to post on what happened on Friday. I've been flooded with emails since then, begging, literally begging to know what happened.*

It's frightfully gauche to talk about money (and yet I still do it...). But let's just say we managed to get ourselves the "plum" items from each of our children's classes, and were in some serious bidding wars. It did get ugly, but we were triumphant as the ugliest of them all. I am even considering charging a premium for the unbearably adorable pictures of other people's children (and their babyfootprints) that I now legally own as they grace the pages of the highly prized Baby Room Scrapbook (because, frankly, I could care less about their kids, and this might help recoup some costs).

I now feel that I can safely spend the next year without participating in one single School Read-a-thon, Pizza Fundraiser, Cookie Dough Fundraiser (actually, I rather like that one) Scholastic Book Drive, Zoo Field trip, or anything else nice for our daycare. ever. And if the teachers think they're going to get end of term, christmas, or valentines gifts, they can think again... I've done my part. License to be the school curmudgeonly asshole, granted.

*remember, I am a liar.

13 comments:

flutter said...

I see 42 buckets of cookie dough in your future

doow said...

I bet Mrs Trellis of North Wales writes to you.

Mary G said...

Stick 'em for every penny they've got.
I'm laughing my fool head off here.

slouching mom said...

I continue to wish that we lived in the same town.

We'd be laughing at the idiocy. All of it. All the time.

karrie said...

Heh.

There was one mother who drove me nuts during a recent fundraiser. She must have bounced up to me six or seven times in the same week to explain how everything worked, gush abt how wonderful life is and to make sure I was selling tickets. @@

virtualredhead said...

Oh no you don't. You'll participate and you'll like it, sweetie. Or I'll be the girl mentioned in Karrie's post. : )

Bon said...

i also wish we lived in the same town. then i'd just high tail over to your house for a cuppa tea and rip my preshus' picture out of the scrapbook whilst you were in the loo.

as it is, in this town, i'll likely have to endure very boring conversation before reaping my reward in such manner.

pity.

wordgirl said...

Don't get me started on school fundraisers. I'd like to say more, but I have to go to school and sell t-shirts...as a fundraiser.

ozma said...

Wow, I'm such a slacker. I don't do any of that, fundraiser or not.

And her school actually needs funds desperately. That place is falling apart. Maybe we can donate some money when hell freezes over and we actually have any. But ya made me feel guilty, thanks a lot!

Honey, it's not LYING it's NARRATIVE.

Her Bad Mother said...

Is this my future? HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK.

Julie Pippert said...

Way to go! You won (which is one of the points, right? I admit, I never win, never enough capital.) and you GAVE. I hope it came with the Your Rock! certificate we offer at our fundraisers (of which I was in charge God Help Me x100). ;)

Now...you are done. Oh no my friend. It is NEVER OVER.

Do you know? I'm never motivated b/c my kids are never in the photos. I'd say camera shy but that would give a sweet, docile impression. More like alligators protecting a nest of eggs from a rifle.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

I laughed about the comment from Doow about Mrs Trellis from North Wales. That's a big joke here in Britain.

Sandra said...

You know that you have just set a precedent don't you. They'll expect you to be super mom at all the next gazillion fundraisers. Dangerous move my friend.