[Part Two of the "Name Five Goals You Have Largely Ignored" meme Slouching Mom tagged me for. Part One below.]
Another Life Goal I have on my mental back-burner as "something I must really get to some day because it would be brilliant if I do say so myself" is to:
Make a short radio documentary on breast-pumping. This would no doubt bring me instant fame and fortune via the This American Life lineup. A reproductive Sarah Vowell, if you will.
Wouldn't it be brilliant? I have it all mapped out and organized already (in my mind).
America's Secret...Millions of Women Are Exposing Themselves in the Workplace, and Doing It With Style...." (or something).
Radio would be the perfect medium for this subject matter. We could sidestep all the full-frontal censorship issues that would annoyingly arise, and so also avoid having our audience visually distracted by the alarming level of equipment involved. The focus would be on the stories.
And, of course, lot could be connoted through ambient sound (ladies who pump--you know what I'm talking about here) and personal anecdotes from various women about "my first time," or "why I opted for the black leather," or "what I did when the Boss walked in" or " "don't tell anyone, but my keyboard is sticky..." and "why does this seem slightly shameful?"
For me the culture of pumping is fascinating because it is so private, so underground, so taboo. All us women sharing the same experience, but sitting (hiding?) in splendid isolation at our desks (or wherever the hell else has been designated a pumping zone) while we pour forth our bounty. So much to talk about. I'd love to produce something that places pumping in its historical and cultural context. I'm envisioning something funny, poignant, and political. I'm envisioning a Pulitzer, dammit!
Yes. This is a goal I would love to get to one of these days. I've been chewing on it ever since I unravelled the tubes and adjusted the flanges for that first tearful session, and my father (Yes, he was there. At this stage in my life I had no sense of personal boundary) said "I am reminded of Barbarella." (Yes Dad. If Barbarella had chapped nipples, "production issues," and a pump that resembled like a nineteenth century combustion engine, that is....)
But stay tuned for the next three installments, where I list all the other fudding Life Goals I need to get to first.