2.23.2007

Math is Hard...But also pure comedy gold! Gold I tell you! (edited)

My friend emailed these to me yesterday, and the husband and I have been snorting over them ever since (thanks K). "Expand" by Peter is my personal favorite. Which one's yours?


























EDITED TO ADD: (this is my brain on Nitreous Oxide)
I jess goh bag from havin my woot canal surjy. I am K, but I M dwoolin' summin ro'en. S'not that bad. Cept for jillion jections. I highly 'mend the gas, coz you don weally care mush.
(I just got back from having my root canal surgery. I am OK, but I am drooling something rotten. I think you will find that it's not that bad, except for the multiple injections. I highly recommend requesting nitreous oxide gas because while you're being stabbed in the gum multiple times, it really takes the edge off and you can just kind of trip out)




36 comments:

Oh, The Joys said...

The elephant, for certain.

Kevin Charnas said...

HHAA!! SO much to love here. I love the hangman...the Find "X" - here it is...and the last one of course.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

OMG, I love the "boss' wife" one along with the teacher's coment---you can just see the teacher shaking his/her head. Hangman is great, and expand is brilliantly obvious! (as is Find X!).

Random Impressions said...

This one is on history - I dont know if it's authentic though
http://www.learnenglish.org.uk/stories/exam_answers.html

Mrs. Chicky said...

OMG, the find X one made me fall off my chair. Here it is! Duh, teacher, it's been sitting here all along.

sween said...

Sooooo good... but "Find x" is pure brilliance.

doow said...

Arf arf arf. The solution to 'find x' should have been given full marks, I think.

jon deal said...

Find X.

That's just genius. And kind of snarky. Like "here it is!" can't you see it? Der.

binkytown said...

I'm so math deficient I can't even figure out what's funny on these.
PS - did you see this?
http://blogs.clubmom.com/daily_dose/2007/02/a_mother_at_any.html
(advanced maternal age???!!!)

Woman with kids said...

I totally could have found x on my own... And I love the hangman!

Christina said...

The elephant is hilarious, but I also love the description of the curve. It's such a smartass answer, with a lot of work put in for something the student clearly had no idea about. If you're going to be wrong, be really wrong, baby.

Lisa b said...

From Peter on down its pretty hard to pick a fave.
I do enjoy the hangman.

Beck said...

See, those are the kind of jokes that require at least some math knowledge. Especially that elephant one. I like how the teachers dutifully gave them zeroes, despite their VERY hard work.

Kelly said...

I don't feel so bad about my D grade in Pre-Calculus now.

And I bet the 'description of the curve' guy is an English major.

MsPrufrock said...

Ah, those never fail to make me laugh. I can't say I'd be disappointed if my kid came home with a test with something like that on it, as I would have to value her creativity.

As for the nitrous oxide, I was never exposed to it before I had my daughter in July. It was delicious and I wish I could have some on tap at home.

sheri said...

hahaha! i had to link to this from mamazine. thanks for the laugh.

Lisa b said...

Hey Joy
Any chance I could get you to email this to me?
slackerdiary@gmail.com
I want to send my nerdy sci teacher friends but then they could find my blog through my comments.

BlogWhore said...

today, i wish i was a teacher.

Domestic Slackstress said...

Problem at the first sight of a number. Why do you think I became a journalist. Geez, I can hardly figure tip! Oy.

mamatulip said...

The "find the x" one and the hangman one cracked me right up. Those are AWESOME.

Pretty soon I'll be joining you with a bag of frozen peas pressed against my swollen mouth...we can be in dental hell together.

Liz said...

OMG, the "find x" one nearly had me off my chair. I love the hangman one just as much. This is particularly funny to me, as I sit for the GRE next Tuesday and the Math part is giving me the vapors. Hope your mouth heals quickly!

cinnamon gurl said...

I'm a word person... couldn't really follow the math stuff. But before my brain melted down I did notice a misplaced apostrophe in the first thing.

I'll take another try since the comments indicate this is something worth trying to wrap my brain around.

Glad you enjoyed the laughing gas...

Karen said...

I agree, find x get my vote for its mind shattering statement of the obvious and also the forgotten statement mark.

Random Impressions said...

As if in sympathy for you, the filling of my problem tooth came out. Have to overcome my mortal dread of the dentist's chair & make an appointment :-(

cinnamon gurl said...

Oh dear. Now I feel really stupid. I actually tried to read and understand the questions... I thought maybe that's where the jokes were.

These actually remind me of a few of my own high school exams... I always figured if I had no idea of the answer, I may as well try to be a smartass.

Can't decide which I like best. The description of the curve or find x.

slouching mom said...

Absolutely, positively, hands-down: "Find X." My engineering professor husband was so bowled over by this one that I had to send him the gif. I'm fairly certain he'll show it to his students to close the first class next semester.

I taught statistics in graduate school and was routinely dismayed (and once in a while amused) by some test answers. Bottom line? You need to be able to add, subtract, multiply, and divide before you can do statistics. At least 25% of each of my (college) classes apparently had never passed fourth grade.

flutter said...

find x is great, that's about how proficient I am at math.

anna said...

Find X.

Here it is!

I wish I had thought of that...

lildb said...

boss's wife, vagina and it's right here are my favorites.

also, pass the gas, please. (unless you weren't actually offering any, in which case, um, haha, never mind.)

mothergoosemouse said...

My dad sent me those too, and I loved them all! Well, after I stopped twitching thanks to the college physics flashback.

Jenny said...

Can't. stop. laughing.

The elephant is totally the best one.

on a plain said...

How on earth did you get your hands on my old math and science tests?

mrsmogul said...

Hmm Yes that looks like some of the writing assignments given to me lately and I just make a face and go..WHAA????

Mimi said...

*snork*

i can only hope my students get so creative in their failures. it shows a gift for ... something, if not the subject matter at hand ;-)

neva said...

laughing. gasping. dying. dying laughing.

*wipes tear from eye* thank you, my dear friend, that was priceless. oh, and freaking hilarious. xox

John Davidson said...

Very funny stuff..so much so this is now doing the rounds on the Open University message boards.