Mommy: "How about Car?"
"How about Carrots!!!!"
"How about COINS?" [jangles spare change jar]
"No thank you Momma"
[mommy looks desparately about kitchen as clock keeps ticking]
"How about this????" [brandishes red wine stained cork from last night]
"Cooo-ool" [boy snatches stained cork before Mommy has chance to rethink idea of sending him to preschool with evidence of parental booze addictions...]
z) Sanity [Left firmly at the door]
Disclaimer: I should add that some mornings I have a partner in crime in all this madness. Their Father. But the selfish bastard has gone and got himself a punishing work schedule this semester, which means I get to do the schlepping alone. This aloneness adds more dramatic impact to my story. And, of course, I make up for his absence by whining about the fact and sniping at him as soon as he gets home late at night.