Now, if I could only do something about the uncanny ability of my newborn, preshus baby to uncannily detect when I get online and decide to promptly wake up...
(typing very quietly now....)
A few days ago I gave up. That sounds bad, and it's really not. What I gave up was thinking that I might actually get anything productive done during the sure-to-come long naps my son was sure-to-take. A couple of weeks back I reported that he was a sleeper. And he is. Except then the wretched "windy pops" (as my old mum likes to cheerfully refer to it) interfered with my plans. And by "windy pops" I mean unrelenting grimacing, burping, stomach gurgling and farting by my wee little chunk o' love, who is obviously not exactly rendered comfortable by the position. This means a lot of walking about, and soothing, and general motion to help him get back to sleep (which means I have broken golden rule #1 of the Baby Whisperer, "thou shalt not rock thy baby to sleep, or turn on vibrating baby seat, lest you create bad sleeping habits later on." whatever. I am now a firm believer that these first few months are a parenting style free-for-all. do what works. for now at least.)
But today and last night (mercy mercy) the wind ceased, and I can only come to the conclusion that my idle thought that "maybe I'll skip the milk products for a bit..." has some substance to it.
If they decided to crown the Dairy Queen, I'd be it. I love, love, love, the dairy products. I am not shy about downing milk straight from the gallon jug with real gusto (go on, try it--it takes some skill). I religiously have something nutritious and twiglike with milk poured over it in the mornings. Ice cream, milk shakes, malts.... sigh...
But mainly, my addiction to cheese would make Wallace look lactose intolerant.
Cheeeeeese. In all forms thankyouverymuch. Lately, I have become a connoseur of the cheesestick, thanks to my son's own love of them (Sargento far superior in my opinion. He prefers the Kraft twist, which is a packaging nightmare as far as I am concerned If mommy need scissors and teeth to open the wretched thing....).
But my real passion is for the good stuff they keep behind the high-quality deli counter. Chunks of aged cheddar. Aged Gouda. Aged anything emitted from a cow (or goat for that matter).
And 'tis the season! The season to whip up the parmesan and artichoke dip for that potluck. To whip up some cream for those lovely mince pies. To slather your bagel with lox and cream cheese. To cram stilton and port on top of your already crammed stomach as a civilized "after Christmas dinner custom..."
Yes, poor poor me. Deprived of my cheese. I wish I could say that my decision to give it up is purely for selfless reasons--for the good of my baby. Certainly, getting less broken nights would be beyond nice. But the thing keeping me going (and it's only been 24 hours, so give me time to backtrack completely) is that without all these pure chunks of saturated fat, I am sure to be sporting a tomboy flat stomach by, say, January.
Ha! Yeah. Right. Maybe my son will acquire an intolerance for bacon, salami, cake, and all refined carbs in general, and then we might be talkin'
For now, pass the chicken wings...
p.s. if anyone has any experience with this, feel free to dispense advice. Son is on about 1 or 2 bottles of formula a day, as well as breastmilk (nipple confusion, schnipple confusion...) Has anyone tried the soy or lactose free ones?