Announcing that I am still very much rotund (not that I need to be pregnant for that). Still very much a plugless slut, but that's about all that's passed these here regions (cough...)
My due date is actually not til next Friday, and at this rate I think I might even end up running late. Of course, that does not mean I am not fanaticizing about my OB trip tomorrow and being informed "MY GOD! You're 8 cm and he's Crowning, are you SURE you don't feel any pain????" Ha! Right.
In the meantime, I am getting very used to this being a complete slob business. I have so far:
1. Knitted one baby hat (yes, I am *that* talented).
2. Made several Origami Christmas Ornaments (and that should be Orna-Gami, according to my instructions).
3. Made good headway into Christmas shopping (I am beginning to feel waves of resentment--don't be hatin' ! Remember, I am not going to want to brave the crowds with boob-demanding infant--especially as our delightful mall recently made a big fuss about women breastfeeding in public....)
4. Taken long hot soaks in the bath uninterrupted. With copious amounts of Burts Bees Oil (to try and stem the side of stretch marks that are beginning to spider out from my poor abused tummy button) and Spiderman Bubblebath for, well, bubbles.
5. Gorged upon unhealthy quantities of Cheez-its, Cadbury's Truffles, Jelly Belly beans (Juicy Pear). With an apple or banana thrown in, you know, for health.
6. Gorged upon unhealthy quantities of TLC, especially Top Chef and (god help me) Bringing Home Baby (which is much more sanitized and fluffy than the terror-inducing Birth Day).
7. Been reading this book, The Baby Whisperer, which is written in such an outrageously British "love-a-duck" accent (liberal references to the reader as "luv" and how "a nice cuppa can boost the spirits when baby is extra-demanding...") it makes me all warm.
Seriously, there is something very reassuring about Tracey Hogg's style. For now. If I were to read this book in another less hormonal state I would probably gag. But right now she's the next best thing to having my Mummy here... Hmmm. yes. Must be hormonal because typing that just made me well up. Best add to the list--
Welled up and often dissolved into cascades of tears over:
- Books that refer to me as "Mum" and "Luv."
- Oprah Winfrey's Dream Come True episode (aired Tuesday)
- Not being able to follow the fucking origami instructions!
- Sorting through teensy weensy baby clothes from when our son was a newborn
- Walking to into our bedroom and seeing cradle next to my side of the bed
- Christmas commercials of pretty much any variety.
8. Oh, and lest I turn into a complete blithering moron, I have also been reading this book, David Rakoff's Don't Get Too Comfortable.
Don't worry. I won't.